Monday, May 25, 2009

checking in.....

It has been a while since I last posted. "Thank you" to those of you who missed me and asked if everything was ok.

It is.

I just made a decision (perhaps unconsciously) to be more present in the moment.

I could spend hours a day on the computer, justifying this time knowing my husband, too, was on his computer...playing solitaire.

But we were living separate lives, not connecting, even if we were in the same room.

He would call out, "I love you!"

I would respond, "I love you too!"

He would repeat, "I LOVE you!"

I would respond, "I LOVE you too!"

and this would continue until I made eye contact and said, "I REALLY LOVE YOU!"

Then he would smile and say, "That's what I wanted!"

You see, it's not what we necessarily say...or hear...it's that moment of connection that requires us to be PRESENT.

So I'm spending more time being present...not just being there....and less time at the computer, being somewhere else.

Being there for Him.

Being there for my husband.

Being there for myself.

I will certainly post again. Being present doesn't stop the ideas swirling around in my head. Ideas that have no other outlet than right here.

We are in a season that demands some major adjustments. Maybe that is why I sense the need to be present right now.

For whatever reason, that may be more clear as time passes, I choose to be right here, right now.

My blogging life will have to get in line.

4 comments:

grammy said...

You are a sweet lady and I understand exactly. My hubby told me once last year that he felt like a widower. We were in the same house but he was watching reruns and I was on the computer... point taken... we both had to change some things. I worry about the young gals that are REALLY into this. Blogging and more. It is time away from family.. yes.. even if you are in the same room or house.. you are not there. Have a fun time with hubby in this new season. Will still check in and hope you do every now and then (o:

Bonnie Gullett said...

Glad to hear from you...even if it isn't daily.
Enjoy the present. Love, Bonnie

Joyce said...

I have been feeling the same need to be more 'present' for my family, and thus have been doing a bit less blogging, too. Here it is late, but I do hope to do a post today anyhow. :P

IRENE said...

I believe we need to listen to that inner voice and go with our rythm. So moving what you wrote about you and your husband!
Wishing you mellow sunny days ahead.